Dream or Reality
by Always Another Secret
Summary: Castiel comes back from Purgatory and Dean is incredibly glad to see he is safe. Warning:Character death... sorry.


_This was a little fic for a friend. I haven't written destiel for a while __so please don't hate me._

"Better?" Castiel said with a smirk and an outwards gesture with his hands.

Dean looked up; he felt something twist in his stomach. Ignoring the feeling he shifted in his seat and gave Cas a brief smile. Quickly, he shifted his attention to Sam. "Could you give us a couple minutes?"

Sam smiled and nodded. "Sure thing," he walked over to where Castiel was stood and gave him a pat on the shoulder. "It's good to have you back, man." He said genuinely, before he exited the motel room.

Shaking his head, Dean stood, he had so many thoughts in his head: how the hell did Cas get out, who got him out, should they be worried? But all he was focusing on now was that Castiel was alive and stood in front of him when he thought he was trapped in Purgatory.

Dean made his way over to stand in front of Castiel. Before he could even utter a word Castiel said quietly, "Dean, I'm sorry… I-" He wasn't sure what came over him, but hearing the other man sound so apologetic, for what? Dean couldn't be sure because the next thing he knew he was staring at Castiel's lips and then surging forwards.

Dean's quick movement had caught the angle by surprise and he stumbled backwards as Dean pushed him against the wall. The kiss was hard and frantic, but it was over before Castiel had time to react. Dean was stepping backwards his eyes wide open.

"Cas… I'm sorry I don't know what came over me." They both stood there for a moment completely still. Dean wasn't entirely sure who moved next but his mouth was against Castiel's once again.

The hunter stood with his hands either side of Castiel's head on the wall, his leg resting between the other man's and pinning him in place. He pushed open Castiel's mouth with his tongue, their tongues clashed for dominance until Dean took control over Castiel's inexperience. The kiss was hot and messy but exactly what both men needed. Dean shifted his right leg and felt the effect he was having on the other man, who gasped at the sudden movement.

Catiel Gasped again as Dean started to move his leg against the other man's arousal. The sounds come out of the angel were unholy to say the least, but Dean loved them and felt each one pool in the warmth forming in the bottom of his stomach. He reached down and lifted Castiel up by his thighs, the other man responded by wrapping his legs tightly around Dean's hips. Adjusting them both, with Castiel still pinned against the wall, Dean started thrusting his hips forward. Even with the layers of clothing between them Dean knew this wouldn't last long, but he couldn't find it in him to care.

"Dean…" Castiel gasped out in a completely wrecked voice. "Dean… Stop. I need-to… tell you something." He said between gasps.

Dean froze in place and looked into Castiel's eyes which were almost completely black with arousal, he slowly lowered Castiel until his feet hit the floor and then backed away giving them both some space to recover.

"Dean-"Before Castiel could get another word out Dean whispered.

"Why did you let go?" Castiel tilted his head in confusion not fully hearing what Dean had just said, so he repeated it louder this time. "Why did you let go? I had you, I could have taken you with me, brought you home."

"Dean that's what I wanted to talk to you about before…. We got side tracked. I did let go, it wasn't your fault. I just-after what I did in heaven… to my brothers and sisters… Purgatory was what I deserved."

Dean shook his head and stepped close to Castiel. "No Cas-"

"Listen to me Dean, I wanted to stay I wanted to pay for my sins. Nothing you could have done would have changed the fact I had to stay." Castiel stepped backwards and walked towards Sam's bed and lay down.

"Then how the hell did you get out of there?" Dean sat on his bed facing Castiel whose eyes were closed.

No response came from the other man. Dean sighed in defeat; they would have to continue this in the morning. He lay down on his own bed and fell asleep to the sound of Casitel's breathing.

He was running. He was being chased by something. He couldn't tell what, he hadn't gotten a good look at the monster's face. Swiftly dodging tree branches left and right I heard the monster fall behind, giving Dean the opportunity to slip out of sight behind a large tree and circle around him.

From behind Dean crept closer and before the monster could turn around his pushed his knife into its back. As he blinked Dean saw a flash of light through the trees. Blink. A desk. Blink. Walls. Blink. And then everything came into view. Dean was stood in the middle of the motel room. He was fine, he was safe, and he wasn't in Purgatory any more. Just as he sighed he heard a pained gasp of breath from below him.

Slowly he looked down to see blood surrounding Castiel. He collapsed to the floor and pulled Castiel towards him and pressed his hands against the wound in the man's back.

"No… No no." Dean repeated over and over. "Heal damnit!"

Castiel replied with a chocked out, "Dean."

Dean saw a glimpse of sliver behind Castiel, when it came into focus he could see an angel blade covered in blood.

"Cas, no I'm sorry-I didn't." Dean stuttered.

"Close… your-eyes." Castiel coughed out, blood running out of his mouth. His eyes started to glow a bright blue.

Dean closed his eyes and pulled Castiel as close to him as he could. Through his eye lids there was a bright white flash and then darkness.

"No. No." He whispered over and over to himself, unable to bring himself to open his eyes.

He couldn't be sure how long he sat there with his eyes closed, it felt like an eternity. When he slowly opened his eyes he could see the outline of ash wings on the bed and wall either side of them. He looked down to see his arms marked with the feathers.

"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry Cas. I… I didn't…" He cut himself off and continued to stare at his arms.

When he tried to brush it off underneath was the feathers burnt on his skin. Forever onwards he would have his first and last meetings of Castiel burnt into his skin.


End file.
